The Invisible Black Woman

They say you have to hear something three times for it to stick. I don’t know if that’s scientifically proven, but it feels about right. I’m not gonna take the time to check the Google right now since I’m tryna enjoy this last bit of restful time that frankly went by entirely too fast. But, if there’s one thing that bears repeating—three times, ten times, infinity—it’s this: Black women, you, we need to rest. Imma make this the final time I tell you this week: rest is not a suggestion—it’s mandatory.

So here’s my final note in this trilogy of rest. Not because I think you didn’t get it the first two times, but because rest is a conversation we need to keep having until it drowns out the noise of “push harder,” “do more,” and “earn your keep.”

Let me say it louder for the people in the back: rest isn’t a luxury. It’s not indulgent. It’s not something you earn after you’ve worked yourself into the ground. Rest is your birthright. And if you really truly need permission to claim it, consider this post your signed, notarized permission slip.

But let’s get real for a second. How often do you hear “rest” and immediately think, that sounds nice… but I’ve got things to do? I get it. The to-do list is never-ending, the emails keep coming, and the world stays asking, “What’s next?” But here’s the tea: the world will still spin if you sit down. The emails will wait. And the to-do list? She’s eternal, sis. Don’t let her guilt-trip you out of taking care of yourself.

Think about it. Even your phone needs to recharge. Your car needs gas. And yet somehow, we’ve normalized running ourselves into the ground like we’re machines that don’t need maintenance. Especially Black women. Especially us.

Do you know the stats? Black women are more likely to suffer from stress-related illnesses, more likely to experience burnout, and less likely to take time off when we desperately need it. Why? Because the world tells us we don’t have time to rest. That we have to be strong, resilient, and always ready to save the day. But strength without rest is a setup for collapse.

Rest isn’t weakness. Rest is resistance. Rest is reclaiming your time from a world that thinks you owe it every ounce of your energy. Rest is the audacity to say, “I’m enough as I am, even when I’m doing nothing.”

That’s why I went offline these past few days—not just to reset, but to practice what I’m preaching. I logged out, turned off notifications, and let the world spin without me. And let me tell you, the peace? Blissful. Unmatched. And yet, I could have done better. I know there were times I was peeking on things I shouldn’t have, but compared to what my starting point was, especially in times past, I am proud of myself for pulling off as much downtime as I did.

The thing about rest is that it doesn’t always feel comfortable at first (I mean, see above). Sometimes, it feels like guilt tapping you on the shoulder, whispering, “Shouldn’t you be doing something?” That’s when you have to shut guilt down like an uninvited guest at your house party. Rest is doing something. It’s doing everything.

So as I wrap up this trifecta of reminders, let me ask you one final time: when was the last time you rested without apologizing for it? Without “earning” it? Without explaining it? If you can’t remember, today’s the day to change that.

I’ll leave you with this: rest isn’t just about restoring your energy—it’s about restoring your humanity. It’s about stepping out of the endless cycle of hustle and stepping into the truth that you are worthy of care, compassion, and stillness. Take that nap. Close that laptop. Turn off that phone. Let the world figure itself out for a while. And remember, I’m rooting for you—always.

Until next time, I wish you nothing but sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns, which are no less fictitious than the kind of rest that fills your soul…

Because you deserve it all and then some.